A Blind Girl’s Dream

I have heard that the world is a beautiful place, full of colors and beauty that surmounts anything that we can ever observe. No doubt about that but how can I form an opinion now? I can’t observe this beauty that so many sing praises of. I am but an insignificant human being with many defects and flaws. Every human yearns for something in their life. Some want love, some want happiness while some are tired of their loneliness and life that they are living. I want something from life too but it is something that everyone has; I want colors.

I have heard that beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder but how should I comprehend beauty when I have no sight. Yes, you read that correctly. I am blind. I have eyes but I can’t see, I’m sightless. My dream is to see colors, the vibrant colors that make the sky an almost powdery blue color while the trees and grass are fresh green with tiny dew drops from the night before still glistening on them. I dream to see light, the speckles of dust in it, and the colors that make up the rainbow. Only I wish I can be gifted with such sight.

I envy those who have the sight to see, the beautiful colors and landscapes around them but they do not appreciate that. I envy those who can witness a flower blooming from a bud but have no feeling for it whatsoever and lastly, I envy those who have sight but are blind for they are the one missing out on life. I wish someday I would have the sight to see this beautiful world whose part I am and will be till I breathe my last breath.

Published by XunairaJ

Born on October 17, 1990 in Islamabad, Pakistan, to a government officer and a homemaker, Xunaira J, as a child dreamed of being a writer.She always loved writing short stories and has been active on Helium (www.helium.com) as a creative writer. She has been a blogger and been writing articles on relationship and family for a long time.When she was young, she used to write for US Magazine. Currently, Xunaira is doing her Bachelors in Mobile and Ubiquitous Computing and writing at the same time. The name of her first book on Amazon Kindle is "The Cursed City" while her second book is a book of collective short stories which will be published in October, 2013. Meanwhile, She is working on another Mystery/Romance novel which is almost reaching completion. She is anticipating to publish it sometime next year.

7 thoughts on “A Blind Girl’s Dream

  1. Humans primary sense is usually vision, so most “normal” people will praise the visible aspects of the world. But, take a flower. While the normal person will see the shape and color, there is much more about the flower. Feel the softness, feel the structure, you can also feel the shape. Feel if it’s warm or cold, wet or dry. You can smell it. You can shake it and feel the elasticity, feel if it’s light or heavy, if it’s sturdy or shaky.

    Normal people totally underestimate the amount of information that the other senses can gather. Admitted, there is little to hear about flowers, but (no kidding) some flowers can be eaten and taste fine.

    I’m weird, I know. I can see, but I sometimes I challenge myself to do things blindly. Walk some way without seeing. Try to hear other people, or vehicles coming. Orient myself by hearing. Or to find my stuff in the flat without lights, without seeing. Put on my clothes, find my shoes and get to the door without seeing.

    Don’t listen to those who only praise the world in terms of seeing. You can’t see a landscape, but you can smell it. Different locations smell differently. Most seeing people don’t take enough care to even notice that. Also different locations have different soundscapes. I’m sure you know this, and much better than me. I just want to tell what normal people usually don’t see or mention – because it is not visible.

    I don’t want to belittle your problems, definitely not. Being blind is really very difficult and a hard fate. But don’t let the thought of the never seen colors and pictures bring you down. You can still explore a lot of the world, through hearing, touching, smelling and tasting. Some of the normal people would not even consider that, and they don’t even know how much they miss out.

    Maybe, if your eye nerves are intact, there will be implants to let you see the world. Scientists research this since a while, but at the moment the nerve and some of the retina must me intact for the implants to work. Maybe there is some hope.

    Don’t let this bring you down. You have your own ways to explore the world. It’s harder for you than for people with vision, but with willpower and skill you can do a lot. While I wish that your dream will come true some day, with help of medicine or technology, be proud of what you can do better than the other people. I’m pretty sure you hear way better than others, and you have a much better sense of touching and feeling things. Honestly, while touching other people is usually frowned upon, I’m pretty sure you can explore much more about a face with your fingers, than you can with your eyes. Be proud on what you can do, your special skills, which the normal people have not developed and often are not even aware of.

    Best of luck, with your dream and your life!

    1. No doubt what you say is true but my point here is about colors. Of course, those who are sightless have increased senses like touch, smell and hearing but the point I’m trying to make here is the colors that we can’t see in life. Even those with sight seem to ignore them and take them for granted therefore, from a blind person’s perspective, it is quite a different topic altogether.

      Nobody is weird. It’s what the society tag us but I’m sure like you many are there who act the same. I can’t claim to be perfectly alright because sometimes I like the darkness as well.

      1. I can understand. Colors are a very intriguing thing. Unfortunately I believe it is not possible to explain colors to a blind person. Even the names of colors are just a convention. A child is taught “this is a red flower” by their mom, and from the moment it will call this color “red”. It’s not even possible to know if two people experience the same in their head if they look at the same color, even if they will use the same word to describe the color.

        The only sure thing about colors is that some trigger bodily reactions. The color named red, it raises blood pressure, lets items appear warmer than they actually are (if you only look, and don’t touch) and it is also a sign of danger, because some dangerous things like fire are red, too, and therefore releases energy in the body, to be prepared for danger.

        The color named blue is somewhat of the opposite of red. It has a calming and cooling effect on many people. This is explained by the fact that big waterscapes and the sky are blue, and the color triggers association to the wide open and calm surfaces. Water also feels cool, and ice has a blueish hue, that might explain the association with coolness.

        The other colors are difficult to put in words. Yellow is the color of the sun, and usually experienced as a light (weightless) color. Also linked to the aspects of instability and volatileness, because light can’t be kept, stored or touched, but easily blocked.

        Orange has a bit of both, yellow and red. It is warm and energetic, a bit like red, but lighter and easier than red.

        Green hasn’t many aspects of it’s own. Green is the color of the plants, and thus associated with growth, and the yearly renewal in spring, which gives hope for a new harvest. So green is sometimes said to be the color of hope, too.

        I can only try to let you know what a seeing person will feel when they see a certain color, but I can’t explain the color itself. And my explanations are full of words, lent from from other senses, like warm or cold, heavy and light, or emotions like calm or feeling energetic. So even a seeing person must borrow from other senses to explain the colors.

        Oh well. I hope I didn’t make it worse with my tries to explain.

      2. Your posting inspired me to write an article about “The neglected senses”, particularly the sense of touch, but also the senses of taste and smell.

        I’m writing in German though, because I feel too clumsy with English, if I want to express fine details in writing.

        But I want to say thanks to you, that you have inspired me for this article. I hope that you can enjoy life, despite the lack of colors and light in your world 🙂

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